Thursday, May 28, 2009

When Revisions Are Necessary

Let's first establish something: I don't WANT any revisions. Revisions to our family and life are fine when they benefit me, but revisions of ME? Not so comfortable.

It has been made terribly evident to me what my funk has been about this last month or so. I feel overwhelmed about the house, the finances, the food and cooking and meal planning and laundry and cleaning and...well....just about my job in general. There isn't one area I feel on top of.
I'm outta control over here folks.

Yesterday I sat down for a day morning of praying and reading (organizational websites and such) and planning. It's hard to do that with the kids in the house and I was thinking that idea for a weekend getaway for the husband and I before the new homeschool year starts was a good idea. Where did I read that? She said to go somewhere nice but not too nice--you'll need to stay in the hotel and actually get some planning done part of the time you are there. But, that's not going to happen any time soon and I've got to get control around here.

So I wrote out a lot of thoughts yesterday, but I didn't get a lot decided. It was good to read over things I know, but have forgotten. It was good to sit and try to make a plan rather than just wander around putting out fires. I wish I could finish that today, but I don't believe there's time in the schedule today.

Today will be a day for rocks. I decided my rocks are: cleaning the kitchen, picking up the living room, doing a bit of laundry or ironing, homeschooling, and making the beds. These are the bare minimum. BARE minimum. So now I can give myself permission to do only those things some days.

I'm still working on the rest of my plan. I don't need to just declutter. I don't need to buy new organizational tools. I don't need to do anything really to the house----I need to change ME. I have to change my habits. I have to become that which, to this point in my life I have considered completely impossible.

I have to become an organized person.

I have never considered myself organized. Probably because it is not in my nature. One of my favorite shirts (sister gave it to me--she knows me well) says:

People like me, who struggle with organization, always laugh when they see that shirt and ask where I got it. Yes, it's funny. Yes, I am not a B.O. (Born Organized--a la Fly Lady). But when it comes to this home and family, I've got no choice.

I have to become organized.

I cannot transform myself, but am depending on the Lord's help. If this revision does not occur, I might lose my mind. God has called me home, so I know He can help me learn what I need to be able to do this job. I remember how happy I was when I first came home part-time. ALL I have to do is the dishes and the laundry??? I thought it was all so simple! It sure seemed a lot more simple than working full time AND trying to keep a house.

But this snake of a messy house and all the homemaking responsibilities has started swallowing me up. Do you know that old song (oh, I think it's a Shel Silverstein peom) about being eaten by a boa constrictor? Oh no! He's up to my toe. Oh gee! He's up to my knee. Oh fiddle! He's up to my middle.

Well, I'm on the "Oh heck! He's up to my neck." part.

So, that's the latest revision around here. I know thousands upon thousands of women have worked all this out before me. I could just read and apply their wisdom....but I really think you have to work it out yourself.
Anyway, I'll be sharing as usual.


  1. Brenda, I feel your pain. You are so right though, we have to do it in the way we are meant to and not by someone else's standards. Will be praying for you and I hope you find it. I've been praying for guidance as well. I hadn't even been blogging for a few days due to not being able to get it together. :( Good luck, and hope you find it and lose the funk soon! ;)

  2. One woman's organization is another woman's chaos! Like you, I have had to work these things out for myself. My number one priority right now: get rid of stuff!!

    It's going pretty well, but I'll get back to you when homeshooling is a part of daily life.

    I'm going to stop now and say a prayer for you while I have a minute. Bye!

  3. Organization is part of one of the spiritual gifts, and I don't believe it is something given to everyone. So I don't know if it's something you can just choose to cultivate or not.

  4. Ha! I'd have to go look it up...if I have time between grumpy boys then I'll let you know!

  5. Yep, I'm with you and Terry. It's something you have to work out for yourself. You can have all the latest and greatest books, blogs and tools by which to go, but if the ideas don't work for you, it's all wasted time amounted to frustration.

    That said, I think you are coming about it all right. To the Lord, in prayer, seeking what's best for you and your family. Amen, sister!

    Praying for you, Brenda! Looking forward to hear how the Lord revises you in this area. :)

    Oh, and P.S. I like your rocks! :)

  6. I find that writing things down (list form) seems to help me make it through the week. I have my BARE minimum, also, and if i don't get anything else but those done, that's OK.
    I think as Moms, Wives, Teachers, etc. we put so much pressure on ourselves to fulfill all our obligations with perfection.
    As I was reading your post the verse Philipians 4:13 came to mind
    "I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength."

  7. Brenda you said all the things I was trying to say a few posts ago! I am also in a funk! So what to do to get out it??? I need my own revision! I am working on it tough! Maybe it is about perspective? Still thinking.

  8. I'm in the same place as you. "Up to my neck" feels more like I'm already in the belly of the snake. Its like I suddenly woke up one day with 5 children, 2 dogs, a husband and a house to care for and am scratching my head as to how I got here and what do I do?!? lol. Weird how it seems to have snuck up on me. I always thought I was one of those "BO" types, but I am finding I am not so much afterall... thank God He will equip us with every good work for His will (Heb 13:21)!

  9. I am on the other side of the bar here as a pretty organized person trying to let go some and not be so .... rigid. I have lists and schedules and more lists that I stick pretty close to.
    My husband has even forced me to not put things up, or to not fold the laundry the moment it comes out of the machine. I feel like I'm going to have a coronary but it has really helped me to "lighten up". My "up to my neck" feeling starts the moment something is out of place. Even if it's just one or two things. I have almost looked at my organization as a disease that is very hard to live with at times and often wished I could be more dis-organized.
    I do have to say though that for me there is a certain peace about being organized and knowing where things are and what I am going to do that day. My favorite saying is "Organization with set you free " and it's true for me.

    I will be praying for you that you find your niche for what is right for you and most productive. Start each day with prayer and study and you will go far in many things. It's so easy but so hard to do sometimes if you don't specifically set aside time for Him.

  10. By the way , Ms. W is correct

    Organization is one of the gifts of the spirit
    It is contained within the governments helps
    You can find it in
    1st Corinthians 12:28 specifically
    If you have any further questions regarding this just email me.
    Love ya and will be keeping you in prayer!

  11. It's not an easy thing, this journey to organization. You DO have to find your own groove for it, and what works with your kids and home. There is no cookie cutter pattern or blanket fix that works for everyone.

    It's just a journey, one day at a time, doing what the Lord leads you to do. And you may find it's not much more than what you're already doing. But however He leads, His peace will come as you obey.

    He can squeeze you back out of the belly of the snake and onto solid ground! :0)

  12. Hey Brenda, I read here occasionally since I am planning on joining fitness friday after I have my baby (in three weeks or LESS - I hope). I have two posts on this very subject, written on January 5 and 6 of 2009 if you need a laugh or some encouragement. The first one is called confessions of a reformed slob. I was way worse than you have probably ever been and, by God's grace, I am doing much much better in the homekeeping dept. Still have a long way to go, but at least it's better than it was. Keep on plugging away. Change takes time:). You'll find what works for you.


I don't get to talk to a lot of actual grown-ups during the day, so your comments make me really happy! :)