Today I read 2 Samuel chapter 24. I don't remember ever reading this story before in the life of King David. I have been thinking about it all day.
King David told his men to go and take a census of all the fighting men in his kingdom. They acted a bit shocked that he would want to do such a thing, but they obeyed. After they had counted all the men, David felt guilty and admitted he had sinned. It wasn't readily understandable to me why....but apparently he was not trusting in the strength of God but taking matters into his own hands and taking inventory of what he had at his disposal. You know, God never was interested in his army having more fighting men than the enemy!
I thought about this story all day as I mulled over our finances. I say I trust God to provide....but then when things are tight I sit and scheme how we can make more money. If I'm not down-right worrying about finances (which I don't do NEARLY as much as I used to) then I'm thinking, thinking, thinking about how I can solve the problem.
Look, I'm not saying that I should just sit here on my rump and not work and wait for God to provide. We must be good stewards. We must do our part. In that light, S and I set up a craft booth last month at a local craft mall. We haven't made any money to speak of on this endeavor. I keep wondering if God really wanted us to spend our time working on things for that booth, or if He just wanted us to trust Him to provide so that we might spend our time serving Him in some way. Did we miss an opportunity? Are we spinning wheels He never intended for us to spin?
Where is the line? Did I move from worrying about finances, to scheming about them?
Either I trust Him to provide or I don't.
I'm not saying no one should do things for extra money! I'm saying that taking matters into my own hands (even just mentally) and planning all the ways I can take care of things just in case God doesn't come through for me is wrong. It's sin.
Either I trust Him or I don't.
Great thoughts! Not so easy to put into practice! If you're obsessing, it's sin. I do the same thing. I can get sick to my stomach over the state of things sometimes, and lose sleep.
ReplyDeleteI have a hard time (when I've not been in the Word enough) of reminding myself that God is still God, and loves and cares for me. What I think is best is not always His best. :0) And He always shows me that eventually. It just takes me a while to get it sometimes.
It's difficult, isn't it? Knowing where that line is between being proactive and being faithless (using human wisdom).
ReplyDeleteIt just underscores our need for time in the word and prayer to keep our hearts at the right temperature.
Speaking of my own experiences, I have come to realize when God is just building my faith. About a day or two after I worry about something and scheme plans and realize I am not putting my faith in the Lord is when God blesses me/us. I have come to realize it is futile to worry about finances, cancer, etc. and take joy in the fact that the Lord is even building my faith and dependance on Him. Look back at every time He has taken care of you and your family and mark His track record with you all, I always feel silly about my schemes after doing that. I will be in prayer for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteWe love you all very much B : )
Wow, Brenda, are you in my brain???
ReplyDeleteWhen we started working our way out of debt and doing monthly budgets nearly two years ago, I honestly stopped feeling stressed about finances. We didn't have much (two grad students here!), but it was enough for our needs and we had a wee little emergency fund for the "stuff" that comes up unexpectedly.
I thank God all the time that he put it on my husband's heart to get our finances sorted out so many months ago, because we've ended up needing every dollar we "found" in managing our money more responsibly. But there isn't any left to find until grad school finishes up next spring, and an extra $200+ in bills each month starts right now. I have been stressed to tears for a week and broke down even more when my husband said this morning that it'll be fine.
I know he's as aware of reality as I am, but it doesn't feel like it! How can he so blithely accept it will be fine? What if the car breaks down? What about when my bill from the emergency room last month comes in? What if...
So thanks for reminding me that I need to just trust Him (and the other him in my life, too!). He's gotten us this far and He will take us the rest of the way, WITHOUT us having to call in Visa as backup.
Good post, Brenda.
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