The Day of Not

Tonight I am not packing a diaper bag.

Tonight I am not figuring how much milk to get out of the freezer for tomorrow.

Tonight I am not writing down the baby's schedule for the babysitter.

Tomorrow morning, I will not be getting up at 5:30.

I will not pray that the baby is hungry at the right time so I can nurse her before work.

I will not wake up a sleeping baby to dress her and put her in the car seat while it is still dark outside.

I will not be loading a breast pump, work bag, diaper bag, lunch, and purse into the car.

I will not drop my child off with someone else tomorrow.

I will not kiss her 20 times before I leave.

I will not pray and cry all the way to work.

I will not pick her up at the end of the day and wonder what she did all day.

I will not miss her smiles, her laughs, her firsts. Someone else will not comfort her when she cries.

Because tomorrow....is NOT the end of my 12 week maternity leave.

Tomorrow....at 12 weeks....I will just continue being her Mommy.

Thank you, Lord, for that blessing.