If We Make It Through December

I took dance for P.E. in high school. Much better than having to play volleyball or run. We stretched every morning to music. That was a really nice part of my day. The teacher played things like Bread and Prince and yes, even Merle Haggard. Those lyrics came to me this morning, sadly.

Whew. Finances are kicking my tail. I'd like to see us as poor, put-upon, hard-working Brenda and S who give so much and have such hardships come their way. But I'm more inclined (always) to see us as stupid, irresponsible Brenda and S who cannot get their act together financially. In truth, I don't think either one are correct views of the situation. And probably its a combination of the two plus some other view I don't even have.

All I know is that I'm glad God loves us. When I quit my job 9 1/2 years ago to come home (part time at first) there wasn't any possible, feasible way it was going to work on paper. And yet here we are. The Lord ALWAYS amazes me with the way things work out. He has an open stage to amaze me this month because from where I stand, things aren't good.

As if a year and a half of medical bills (still paying for Bee and that other little trip I took to the hospital) weren't enough, we've had a doozy of a spending spree on the medical front lately. Nothing like Carrie. She's the queen of the copay this fall. Still, we've spent nearly $400 on medical and medical related stuff since the week before Thanksgiving. Ouch.

On a happier note, we have our homeschool group's Christmas party today. The girls are each going to play a song on the piano. Little Bit has worked SO HARD to learn hers. It was so difficult for her and I'm so proud of her effort. I had to enlarge the sheet music and copy it onto 2 different colors of paper so the lines are alternating colors. I pasted all that inside a file folder so she can see the song better. Seeing double is a bummer. The girls are also going to do a little comedy act together. They've had so much fun practicing for it. And of course we have a book exchange. Our used book store here in town is going out of business and we got 3 books for the names we drew, plus a book Sweetheart wanted, for $7. I was very happy about that!

We are finished with piano and choir until the new year. That's a relief. I like being "off" for a while. Today we are knocking off of school because we have the Christmas party all afternoon and I need to drive to the big city to pick up a form for Sweetheart's physical therapy. Having some trouble with all that which I'll update you on later. So we're going to spend our remaining few hours cleaning the house. Whenever finances are bad, I ALWAYS have a desire to clean the house.

Is it because I feel out of control and want order? Does it make me feel more responsible? Do I think "Well, the least we can do is have a clean house?" I don't know, but it always happens. Psychoanalyze that.

And now I will count my blessings. Some of them.

1. Salvation from my Lord.
2. My husband and daughters.
3. A roof over our heads.
4. Cars to drive.
5. Food in the kitchen.
6. Heat.
7. Clothes to wear.
8. God's love.