When I Just Don't Get It

I just love those disciples of Jesus. They were so lost sometimes. I can just see them standing there, hearing Jesus' teaching or watching his actions, inwardly scratching their heads and wondering what on earth it meant. Whenever they got him alone, they would ask, "Explain this to us..." They were still figuring things out after he rose from the dead.

If the men who walked so closely with Jesus during his ministry didn't understand things sometimes, it makes me feel just a bit better. Sure, more things have been revealed these days and I do have the entirety of scripture before me....but still.

Matthew 16: 5-12 tells a story about a time when the disicples just didn't get it. Jesus warned them about "the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees." They talked among themselves (can't you just see them kind of huddling up?) and decided Jesus was talking about how they had not brought any bread with them.

Bread? Jesus explains things to them, but you can hear the exasperation in his voice..."How is it you don't understand..."

Eek. I should understand WAY more than I do. I grew up in church. We own shelves of Bibles. How is it that I don't understand more?

How is it that I grew up not questioning more things? How is it that I made major decisions (marriage, birth control, jobs, etc.) without really digging into scripture? Heck, without even conslulting it? It isn't that I didn't think something like birth control was important...it's just that I never thought about it. Not once. I did what everyone else did.

I saw a mom rushing in from her medical job (she was wearing scrubs) today to pick up her baby from the daycare at our church. It was 5:00 and you can bet she hadn't seen her son since before breakfast that morning. And I was angry.

Not at her. She probably has to work. I am angry that so many of us just do what is expected and never even think there could be another way. Or that God is powerful enough to provide another way. Don't we think He WANTS us to follow His will? Then won't He make a way? Why do we just blindly follow the path laid out before us, shrug and say, "what can I do?"

Why don't we get it? Why don't I get it? I want to be bolder. I want to question everything. I want to ask God, "what do I do?" I am very tired of the path I have been on. It isn't about making all the right decisions. It's about knowing God. It's about understanding His word.

He promises:

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:5

I should have asked sooner. But don't you just love that word "generously"? He won't just get me enough for me to get by, or to improve on where I am. He will give it generously! So sometimes when I'm feeling all smug because I understand a section of scripture...then I read an entire paragraph on Pyromaniacs and understand NONE of the words (and they are in English) or an entire section of scripture and then say, "HUH?" And I realize I am not quite where I want to be.

Like I said, I should have maybe asked for this wisdom sooner. But I am no where near where I used to be. God indeed gives generously to all without finding fault. So even if you feel like you are spending most of your time scratching your head...there is hope.

That much I know.

Don't Expect This Too Often

I am going to tell you about a book I am reading. Why can you not expect this too often from me? Because I am not one of those blogs with a sidebar entitled "What's On My Nightstand." True, I do have a book list down there, but I flip back and forth between those books so much that the same ones just might stay there all year.

The thing is, I grew up reading in bed at night. At my childhood home, it was imperative that everyone have a lamp on their nightstand. My parents, sisters, all of us read something before we went to sleep. I continued that in college and thankfully, my roommate read her Bible every night so the light didn't bother her.

And then I got married. S didn't seem to mind at first. Then, while I was reading, I would hear a little noise. It sounded kind of like "phew." What was that? I looked over at my dear husband, whose eyes were closed, and saw that he was pretending to "blow out" the light on my nightstand.

He is just so funny, ya'll. Needless to say, he wanted me to read in the living room but everyone who reads in bed knows that is just no good. The point is to read until you are sleepy and then just roll over and go to sleep. (After blowing out the light!) And, as I have pointed out to him several times, it's dark if you close your eyes. He just doesn't see things my way.

So, it's taking me a while to get through this book. But not just because of not reading at night. It's because I keep having to re-read sections. My mind cannot absorb it all.

The book is Homemaking by J.R. Miller. (There's the pic right off of Amazon for you.) If you have read it, then you already know. If you have not, this post is for you. This book would be a great read for any Christian: husband, wife, older child, etc. It isn't about being a homemaker as we think of today. The title is decieving.

This book is about what a Christian home is all about. There is a chapter for wives, a chapter for husbands, one for children and lots of other topics about the workings of a Christian family. Or at least how the author believes God intended it to be. I have to say I have seen nothing to disagree with yet. In fact, I have spent most of the time thinking two things:

1. Wow. I never even thought about that before! and
2. Man! I wish I read this before I got married!!!!!

My daughters will read through this book with me before they are married, that much I know. I am so in awe of some of the sections, and the writing is so beautiful and rich (I have never read writing like this) that I am reading and re-reading sections over and over to really let my mind absorb what is being said. Every single thing I have read has been completely relevant to my life today. Why is that incredible? Because the book was first published in 1882. How can this book be about MY life if it was written 111 years before I got married?

Because God is unchanging, folks. So don't let the old picture on the cover fool you. I also thought, "Is this going to be one of those books that encourages us all to go back to Victorian times?" It's not. Don't worry. It's not. It will encourage you to go back to God's word and to re-think your own marriage and family and home life.

If that interests you, I strongly encourage you to read this book. There you go...the one and only book review this blog has ever done.

Keepin' It Real: I Am Quite the Chef!

This post from Anna made me reminisce about my early days as a cook. And I use that term VERY loosely. Although her post was serious (and I really enjoyed it) I couldn't help but remember with humor how I got my start.

What was my first clue that I was not a master chef? It was the unfortunate spaghetti incident of 1990.

My roommate and I decided to cook spaghetti for a bunch of friends of ours. We filled the pot with water, dumped the pasta in, and it was only a few minutes later that we smelled something odd coming from the kitchen. Quick, call dad! What? You're supposed to let the water boil before you throw in the pasta?

Oh.

And then there was the cornbread. My other roommate made the most awesome cornbread with sugar in it. The cornbread I grew up eating was not sweet. I LOVED her cornbread. So, one day while I was mixing up some cornbread batter before supper, I called out to her, "How much sugar do I add?"

She, thinking I was mixing up a pitcher of iced tea, answered back, "1 cup!" And so I added one cup to the cornbread batter.

What I pulled out of the oven a few minutes later can only be described as caramelized corn-blobs. They were truly something to behold. My roommate took my picture with them and oh how I wish I could post it. However, pictures from college are safely up in the attic and I don't do attics. I believe after a few minutes of chiseling the decision was made to toss the entire muffin pan as the two had become one for all time.

Those were my humble beginnings. But tonight? Tonight I got three compliments from my family on my "wonderful supper." And what did I serve?

Why bacon, scrambled eggs, and canned biscuits.

I know you are in awe of my culinary skills. And now it's your turn. Help us keep it real in the blogosphere: what is your best (or worst) cooking disaster? Do share!

***Edited to add: ACTUALLY, I am an award-winning cook. My casserole won first place at a church event and don't think I didn't display that little certificate on my refrigerator for at least 3 years because I did. And referred to it often. :)

I Might Regret This Later

I haven't been Little Bit's Bible class teacher since she was in the babies class at church. So, she doesn't remember me ever teaching her. I taught Sweetheart when she was 2, 4, and for her whole 1st grade year. So, I feel that it is Little Bit's turn to have Mommy for a teacher. The kids who are Little Bit's age at church are just so different from Sweetheart's peers. And, the class is a mixture of 3 and 4 year olds. Very young 3 and 4 year olds. With a lot of boys.

I just might regret this decision.

It's just that I feel there is room for improvement in her Bible class. I don't think the expectations are high enough. So, instead of complaining...I'm teaching.

I feel responsible for my daughters' spiritual development. I cannot trust others to do it for me. I truly wish I could be in both daughters' Bible classes, but I haven't figured out how to be in 2 places at once. All I can do is make sure we do what we need to at home and treat Bible class as a bonus. And ask a lot of questions when class is over.

I will be resurrecting Squirmy the Worm for this class. I got the idea for Squirmy from one of my favorite sites, Danielle's Place. Squirmy was part of the Fruit of the Spirit lessons I taught Sweetheart's class her 4 year old year. He is made from a striped sock. I stood in our kitchen hot gluing him together one day while then 4 year old Sweetheart watched. That night in Bible class as I "talked" to Squirmy in front of an extremely attentive audience, Sweetheart looked up at me with eyes of wonder and asked, "Mommy, is he REAL?"

Puppets are magical!

I have to rearrange the classroom and redecorate it this week. It's been exactly the same for a little over a year. I'd like to get everything ready this week and send the message to my little friends that things are going to be different now.

Re-reading an old post about all this made me wonder if I'm crazy for volunteering for this, though.

But here I go anyway. Because I love my daughter.

Did You Feel the Earth Shift?

Yep. That was because I, ME, I actually bought and wrapped Christmas presents today. IN NOVEMBER.

Folks, this has never happened.

I will be just as curious as the girls come Christmas morning to find out what's in all those packages.

'Cause there is no way I will remember by then.